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About The Eugene City guard. (Eugene City, Or.) 1870-1899 | View Entire Issue (May 2, 1891)
EUGENE CITY GUARD. I. I CAMPBELL, Fraprleter, EUGENE CITT. OREGON. He WH "Delleloualy" Sa4. A friend of mine, tlie youngor mem ber of whoso family are given to using senseless phrases much affected by the yonth of this good old town, tell me that, after many futilo effort, he suo eeedod In o forcibly bringing the ab eurdity of tho habit to their attetftion that they have In a measure droppod It With them every now thing was "awfully" sweet, every social gather ing they attended was "awfully" Jolly. One evening he came home with a budget of news. A friend of his had failed In business. He spoke of the In cident as "deliriously" sad. He had ridden uptown In the car with a noted raconteur and wit, whom he described as "horribly" entertaining, and to cup the climax, be spoke of some butter that was set before him at a country hotel as "divinely" rancid. "I should think, papa," said the eld est daughter, "tliat you were out of your head." "Not tho least, my dear," be said pleasantly. "I am merely try ing to follow the fashion. I worked out 'divinely rancid' with a good deal of labor. It sees 'awfully sweet' and toes It one better. You will And me 'In the swim' hereafter. And now," be added, "let me help you to a ploce of tills doliclously tough beef." Ad verbs are not as much misused in hi family as they were, at least not in bis bearing. Boston Post Parsons and Guide Poata. In the winter of 18G0 or 18C7, I am not sure which, my friend the Rev. Jolin Uussell and myself were returning after a long day's hunting across Dart moor (not Exinoor), and found our selves In the neighborhood of the little village of Wlddecombe-ln-the-Moor. II r. Bunnell proiosed that we should cull on bis old friend Mr. Mason, the rector of Wlddecombo, and a well 1 n nnnl.iL(iii fl.itnf arwtmulinr uncertain of tho road, we inquired of a rustic the wuy to Mr. Mason's. "Be ye ,!., mWst" whji the rniilv: ' W 1 vnre. and vo'll see Uieaster stan'Ina ' .r.,r off roacL" "He nihrlit" of primogeniture the estates, and have been there wbon you left," ..II...J Tl.. ...... II 'lnf ,...f twiia " -un, yes lie oo. amp, ixw, w , goin- tuui way, wait un i siiuu iu gate, anu i n snow eu. iuu wis u trudged along by our side till we came to a cross road, and pointing to the euldo pout sold, "I here he bo," and upon Hussoll inquiring bis meaning, be' replied, "Lor', ineuMorl don t 'oe know oilers Dolntiiw t' way ye should eo, I and novor goin' hissel'." Whun we or Mp Mnium'a Tn,.k Pimui.il m. poatod the story. "Dung him 1" quoth fiZ .......... ...i....'- ...... r,.. rn -i- u i Ti... Vj,p i Tn.i HIIDll IllUh k weave, eVvoa I g don Spectator. Prlnca Kaiolfon Id F.llla. As to Princo Napoleon's dully life in Lis Prnngins retreat, bo rises with tho tun, lounges or works lu bis studio and receives visitors, If nny tliero be, until luncheon, which is nnuouneed for 1 1 :43 a. ul and never lusts more tliun hulf an hour. Immodiutely afterward, and no matter what the weuther muy be, I be takes a long walk beyond the con- fines of bis park, mid returns between 2aud3p.m. to ouoji his mall corre-, spondence, which comes to hand diir I big bis afternoon stroll, and which is always voltimtnous and very regular. This occupies him until the dinner hour. In the evening ho plays chess w ui neiKuuors or wiw uuuiiu. i wuuau (it. t .1.1 111. J..tll...l !..!.. ! ineuus, sucu as ai. Aaoion, unron uru- Martin muy nmt.h blttcr eaUcated. net and one or two others who arrive and have more polished and quiot man in turn. Knch shartw his exile for a nors, than ninoout of ten of your Amer few days. lie prides himself upon be- Jcau acquaintances! and yet it might be ing a great player, but shows himself a bettor that Paulino should marry the very bad one, peclully with M. Ado- least attractive of the latter than Mr. Ion, who vies with him In the wittiest Martin." and most comical manner imaginable. I "1 wish you would see him and find He retires toward 11 o'clock. Paris out whether he Is nice," said Mrs. Noleu, Uaulois. A Bait HorlUf Well. An artesian well, now pnrtly com pleted, at Pestli. Hungary, hits reached disqualify mu from forming an unbiased a depth of 1,400 yards, and by the time opinion." it is finished will be the deepest of Its I 'oh 1 un not B-fraIJ of Hlot- MT hu kind In the world. It Is lutendod to band used to say that there could be uo sunnlv hot water foracreat bathhouse connected with a large hotel; at pres ent that which Is obtained bos a tern perature of 1M dogs. Fahrenheit, and it Is expected tliut 1,500 yards will raise the temperature to ISi dogs, or 200 degs. The most curious feature about this well Is the adaptation to It of onto luetic machinery for boring, the water power for which Is supplied by the well Itself. Uy tills means the borinir has been conducted at double Its previous ; rate. Surely this is a great aire when water spurting from a well can be so haruessed as to Increase the depth of the well from which It comes. St Louis licpublio. Any Kfruaa Walcama. His Nurse You are to be discharged to-morrow as curtnL Dorringtoit (who has fallen deapor ately in love) My own, would it b presumptuous fur metoask you to give me an overdose of morphine or some tiling, so that I could stuy a day or two longer! Judge. A Fatherly raallng, Mr. Greatbeart (capitalist) I trust, Ilr. Bqueezem, that you deal kindly with my tenants. Mr. 8queetem (agent) Just like father, my dear sir. In fact I have nothing but a pay "mUl feeling fti Uiem all Pittsburg Bulletin. Ne llaagar. Maude I'm so afraid our engage Bent will find Its way Into the papers. UawRe Never mind, darling; If It docs our names will be so misapplied mat do one will be any the wisoc Puck. Hogs sre quarantined for twenty-one days at Victoria, B. C. rWrsmentooiftVUls propose to break op the highbinder dens in that city. Csptaln Tlioniss Woodruff has bean spponted General Hunt's aide at Sin 1'raniciaro, ANOTHER'S CRIME. nOM TBI DIARY Of INSPECTOR BTRJTCS. Bj JULIAS HAWTHORKE, Author of "The Great Bank Bobber?," An American Penman," Eta (Copyright by 0. H. Dun bun. sod pubuahed, throufb apodal arrangement by the A men owl tram AMOcUUaa Vila Caaeell i Co, titw York eea Imdooj '"I am not altogether convinced that bis being a friend of Percy would de prive bis visit of significance," said the judge. "It Is conceivable, at any rate, that he might have made a friend of Percy in order to facilitate bis access to Pauline. "lie seemed a frank, straightforward young man, not one you would suspect of doing anything underhand. The judge laughed; a very low, pleas ant laugh liu had, which made those who heard it disposed at once to like him. "You are more like a nun, in your tin suspiciousness and unworldlinesa, than like a married woman who goes io New York society," said he. "Let mo assure you, my dear, that a man in love is not to be held a criminal, or even a hypo crite, if ho uses some strategy to get near the object of his affection. I should for cive Mr. Martin even if be went so far as to pretend a cordiality for Percy that be did not really feel, If so he might in duce Percy to admit him to the intimacy of rour household. No, if we are to take exceptions to blm, it must be from another standpoint What do you know about his personal history and bis social standing in his own couutryr "1 suppose it must be good," said Mrs. Nolen. "1 think he said that his family owned a large estate In Cumberland." "Is be the eldest son?" "The next to the eldest, I believe." "And what is his business in Amer ica?' "I don't know. Dut a great many En gllsh people come here nowadays, you know. It is a part or their education. "Yes; but some of them are pretty well educated before they got here, re- mnrliiHl I ha (ikil'O drvlv. "and occasion ' .11. ftm. mniinim 11 tnnfll lis "1 nwiflilnr. Ail lM..l4jW irw.uv.,..ug before they leave. There Is In England the snrae difference between an eldest son and the othor sons that there is be- tkh mttn and PauI'or' B? tho generally the bulk of the money, goes to the lirst born; the other boys got poei tlons, if they cun, hi the army, tho civil tho church xllc, Bn5 KUom flttod CIlU,r learned professions, and It U not considered good form for a Ecntioiunn's son to go into trade. Of course the army and tho church don't afford accommodation for all applicants, and tho consequence is that every year a number or young tngiisnmenaro thrown on the world, who by training and inchna- tion are good for nothing but to be idle and ornamental, and who nevertheless 1,0 "10U"? for ll0n,C8t1' 'uad'K ul a life. They form a class of gentleman adventurers. They are men of agreeable ...li. manners and culture, talk well, look well, are excellent ut cards and billiards, and live no one knows how. Soino of them come over here for reasons known only to themselves; tlioy are very picas- ant acquaintances, but it is well not to trust thorn too far. Ihoy have no fixed Dlaceiiithoworldandiioresnonwhilitv, "You don't mean that Mr. Martin is an adventurer?" demaitded Mrs. Nolen, in a voice of faint consternation, "So far as 1 know bo may be the best follow In England. Dut I know nothing about him one way or tho other, ilow ml l'ercy become acqunmieu with himf "ilo met him somowhere at some club, I Imagine. " "That may be all right, or it may not At all events, you will see Unit you should proceed with some circumspection. The rules tliut n;iply to our young men do ot nccusgarily np)y foreigI10r,. Mr. with anxious earnestness. "1 would willingly do so, but for one reouon," Die judge replied, "and that U that the peculiar circumstances might impwiiw anu jus( man you. "Even assuming that judgment of his to have been hupartiul, 1 should never theless bo disqualified from presiding nt a trial where, for Instance, the prisoner was charged with the murder of some friend of my own." "I do not understand. Mr. Martin ha surely not murdered any oneT "Dless me, nol I was ouly using an extreme illustration. Put Mr. Martin : might wish to obtain something which 1 wy own ,lenrt on vmKmbtgi There was a manifest embarrassment In the judge's manner. Mrs. Nolen looked, puxxlcd. She began to suspect tliero was something behind all this, but she could not divine what it was. "I began life pretty early, as you know," continued be, after a pause. "Since tho age of 14, I beliove, I have supported myself. Measuring my exist ence by thut standard. I might be called an old man. But thougli, lu the matter of years, 1 am not exactly a boy, yet I am but 43 years old, and you will admit, my dear, tliut men have been known to live a good deal longer than that" "1 am sure you will live to be twice 43," put In Mrs. Nolen kindly. "Half that Is all 1 would ask, If I might realize the happiness that 1 hope for," returned the judge, with a faint smile. "And Is tills happiness anything that I can help to Insure youT "I can hardly say that In fact, It is essential in one way that it should come. If Cume at all, as fively and spontane ously as the sunshine from heavea Nev erthcless, I am under obligation to speak to you of my hopes, that you may ap preciate my position and understand my conduct" He stopped, and the color mounted to bis face. "I love Pauline," be said, a strong emotion vibrating In bis voice, "I hope to make ber love me and to accept me for ber husiiand." "Oh, judr exclaimed Mrs. Nolen, taken wholly by surprise. She looked at him Intently for a few momenta, and then the startled look la ber face sof V ened, and alia began to smile. She loft ber chsir. and. comint to where he sat put a band upon lib shoulder; and as be Looked up at her she bent down and kissed hlra upon the forehead. She was still smiling, but there were tears in her eyes. "Do you think me absurdT st!d the Judg "1 think you ore right." was her reply. "At first I could not believe 1 had al ways looked up to you as to a sort of elder brother I could not Imagine you as the husband of my little daughter my own son-ln-law. Hut I think you are right Pauline is a little girl no longer; la almost everything but years she is older than I; she is fitted to be the wife of a man even so much older than herself as you are. No one of her own age would suit her as well." "Then you will not be against mcT be sold, starting up. "Indeed, I will not All that I do shall be done for you." She put her hands in bis, and he grasped them warmly. "It is more than half selfishness in me," she added. "It would give me some right to rely on you. I should not feel so lonely." 'However this may turn out, always know that you may rely on me," the ludee returned, with deep feeling. "Our friendship began long ago, Mary, and doesn't need any other tie to bind It If Pauline, when the question is put before her. decides against me and I am fully aware how easily that may be her ver dict I shall accept it like a man, and you will remember that, so far as I am concerned, It will involve not the slight est change In my devotion to you and yours. 1 snail leave no nonoraoio means untried to win ber; but, above all things, I desire to avoid forcing her inclination, either by any act of my own, or through M. . I ll . you. inaiyou suouiu approve oi uj r iii-nose Is au l asit. wave me rest io Providence, and to her." "I understand," said Mrs. Nolen, "and, Indeed, if I wished to help you, I should not do it by singing your praises to her. You being what you are, the best thing to do Is to leave ber to find you out for herself." "If Mr. Martin be my rival," resumed the judge, "let him have hia chance and defeat me If he can. If he be the better man it will appear; and God forbid that I should mako her my wire knowing that she would have been happier with an other. But if love go for anything, I love her well, and In all my lifoslio is the first and only woman I have loved. "You might have rivals more danger Otis than air. Dianin, roiurncu me mother, with another smile, and so the Interview came to a close. CHAPTER IIL MRS. CUTtlBERT TDNSTALL. vents were shaping them selves for disas ter; but, for tho time being, they seemed to go smoothly enough. Percy Nolen maintained his brilliant career, and attained a certain distino tion among tho persons with whom he associ ated. Ho was a big, handsomo youth, with broad shoul ders and sturdy limbs, a clever boxer, a good whip, a fair billiard player; his spirits were exuberant, ami ho had more mental resources and Ideas than are vouchsafed to the generality of young gentlemen of his kind. Thus hoassuuied, to some extent, the position of a leader among them; and, as he was uniformly good nuturcd and yet not to be imposed Uxn, be was liked and not laughed ut liut his favorite companion and menu was Valentine Martin, me two men were nearly the same ago, Martin being a little the elder, and were a good deal alike in size and personal apiearance. Martin, being English, wore side whisk ers, and Percy, being American, wore a mustache. Martin was Inclined to be fuir and Percy to be dark; but they might have been taken to be brothers. The Englishman, however, was of a somewhat gloomier temperament than the American; more reticent and more given to moods and inequalities of tem per. He had brought with him several good letters of bitroduction and had duly delivered them, but he had availed him self but sparingly of the social courtesies extended to him, seeming to prefer a less formal and regular life. He made no pretense of large wealth, but on the other band, he never seemed to be cramped for means, and no one could be found from whom he had borrowed money. If he were a trifle mysterious, nobody was concerned to fathom his mystery, for it was uo one's interest to do so. Valentine Martin had not come to America to speculate, to organize a company, to raise capital, or to do any of those tilings that are apt to render en gaging foreigners suspicious In our eyes. He had apparently come to amuse him self and mlud hia own affairs; and after a time be was permitted to follow this innocent Inclination. The upper ten, whom he neglected, ceased to take an active Interest In him, and those with whom he associated relinquished the vain effort to persuade him to reveal bis secret and came to the sensible conclu sion that there was probably no secret to reveal The acquaintance and subsequent friendship between Martin and Percy Nolen bad sprung up spontaneously without any formal Introduction. They bad tastes and ideas in common, and they mutually pleased one another. Martin's was perhaps the stronger character, but Percy's was the more enterprising and lively; so tliut they were upon fairly even tonus. One day the Englishman accepted an invitation to come and take afternoon tea at the Nolens'; be met Pauline on that occasion, and it was not afterwards necessary to urge him to re peat his visit Pauline was Interested in him as an Englishman, and after discuss ing his native country with him ad mitted him to a certain degree of friend ship, partly on her brother s recommen dation, partly on his own account He seemed gloomy at times, and she was sorry for him, without knowing or even caring to inquire what made her so. At other times he conversed in a manner that Interested ber and stimulated ber to talk In return; and, though Pauline was but a girl, she had a mind that was worth coming In contact with. The English man never made any direct demand upon ber sympathies or emotions, and probably he gained rather than lost by this forbearance. When a woman has Insight she would rather exercise ber in tuitions than hare thing explainsd to her. a TiTZM I m,. nora wKnt on In this manner for months, and the year's vacation which Percy had allowed himself was mnrs tluin un. He had as yet shown no sign of being bankrupt, unless a certain abstraction of manner at times, accom panied by a biting of his nails, and a drumming with his foot, might be con strued as symptoms of approaching im pccunlosity. But another affair, not connected with finance, was going on at this period which, unless put an end to betimes, might result m irouuie. There was a young married woman in New York society named Mrs. Cuthbert TunstalL Her husbund, also young, bad inherited from his father an Immense business in coal. Cuthbert Tunstal! was fond of activity, and he plunged into his coal with hearty good will, intent upon creating a fortune twice as large as that which his father had left him. As a matter of courso, and of necessity, he was absent all day at his office, and was often obliged to run down to the mines to oversee things there in person. His wife was the daughter of an aris tocratic Knickerbocker family; she had been a reigning belle In her coming out year, and the year following the match between ber and Tunstall had been made. She liked her husband, because be was a good fellow, because he was in love with ber and because he was considered a big catch; but she cured nothing for coal, and was jealous of his devotion to it She wanted him to be devoted to her and to nobody else. She hated to think of him working actually working all day long. Ho came home to dinner, it was true; but be was not fond of dining out, and when dinner was over, he was tired, and liked to stay quietly at borne and go to bed at half past 10. Such an existence as this was the next thing to unendurablo to a woman like Sylvia TunstalL Forty years hence, perhaps, this Darby and Joan kind of life might be practicable; but not now, in the flush of vouth. variety and curiosity! She ab solutely would not stand itl Tunstall was a manly, straightforward, single hearted fellow, and at first be did not comprehend his wife's attitude. He bad homely ideas of married life, and the routine of social dissipation was without attractions for him. When at lost he learnt bow matters stood, be thought It over, and came to the conclu sion that his wife had much reason on her side. She was young, good looking and full of the vine or lire, and it was only natural and proper in her to wish to see and to be seen, bo be began by at tempting to "go out" with her; but he presently discovered that going to bed at 3 o'clock in the morning was not com patible with having breakfast at half post 7. He then tried giving dinners twice a week and a reception once a month; but Sylvia pointed out to him that the customs of good society de manded that they should accept invita tions as well as give them; so that his second state bade fuir to be even worse than his first What was to be done? lie would not consent to give up his busi ness; on that point he was firm. Sylvia was equally convinced that it was im possible to give up society. For a tune there threatened to be a deadlock. Finally a compromise was effected. Sylvia bad relations and particular friends who were In society, and of whose escort and countenance she could avail herself. Her husband could take her to places and her relatives or friends could bring her home again. By degrees it was found unnecessary to have him take her, and she both went and re turned without him. His anticipations of domestic felicity were disappointed; but Sylvia was enjoying herself, and he always looked forward to a time when she would weary of uayety and return to him. He loved her as much as ever, and was proud of her social popularity; be bad perfect faith in her truth and honor. He ate his dinner and went to bed alone, and when be rose in the morning be was tereful not to awaken his wife. , That was the style of the menage. But Cuthbert Tunstall was not a fool a fact which his wife perhaps failed to fully appreciate. As long as her conduct was above reproach, according to the somewhat vague standards of society, he would not Interfere with her pleasures; but he was not the man to permit the least step beyond this. And though be was naturally unsuspicious, and slow to wrath, any one who understood men would have known that it would be un comfortable to arouse him. But Sylvia got the idea that she could do exactly as she pleased, and Bhe did it One day Tunstall got a hint from some precious friend of his a very distant, indirect ambiguous and innocent hint, but a bint all the some. He appeared not to understand it and passed it over without comment; but the repressed emotion which it aroused was so strong that he came near fainting where he stood. He attended to his business the some as usual, returned home at his customary hour and sat down to his solitary dinner. His wife was upstairs dressing. By and by she came down to say good-by to him for the evening. Bhe was beautifully dressed and was lovely to look upon. Cuthbert looked at her in silence. "Good night dear," she said, drawing on her gloves. "I suppose you won't be op when I come home." . "Not if you come at your usual time." "I wish you'd drop your horrid busi ness and come with me." "1 am more useful as I am. Do you know a gentleman by the name of Percy Nolen?" "Percy Nolen? No yes I believe I do," These were her words, but ber face and the tone of her voice betrayed her, and they both knew It "He is an agreeable fellow, Isn't he?" pursued the husband, quietly. "I suppose he is like the rest; all men are alike to mo except you, of course, dearl Uut why do you ask?" "Some one who knows him happened to mention him today. Weli, and what is going on to-night? "Dine at Mrs. Murray's, and then the theatre." "Won't you want something to eat when you get homer "Oh, no. Dont bother. I shant be hungry." "It might be better to order something to be ready for you here than to taka supper at Delmonico's," he said slowly, loosing ner in tne eyes. She turned away her eyes after a mo ment ostensibly to pull up her cloak. "I had no idea of going to Delmonico's," she said, in a slightly strained voice, "Of course not!" he repeated; and then he turned to his evening paper, and she went out with a smile on her lips and fear in her heart t SI CO)fTDaRD. IT 13 TIME 60ME YOU IN HAND. Two Wsye of Aetln Wlian ou Come Uome-Tliinc Vou Should Uo and Thoae Toil Should Not lo l Courae This Don't lean Too, but It flla Voor Neighbor. There Is so much excellent advice given to wives. supixiHe, for a change, we turn around and read the husbands a nice I nf Mirrect behavior. It is hhrh time some one took them in hand; but although I have had my eye upon them for a good while. I have been com ered to find a ripe opportunity. In ttie first place, to plunge right Into the midst of things without further wait ing, how do you go home to your wifeat night? Chapters have been written as to how she ouL'ht to receive you; now iui me say a word about the other side of the question. When you una a urea littln unmnn who has. been so hard at work all day with five babies and an in competentgirl, callers. and miscellaneous obs of mendine, pastry musing ana nir-ltlini?. that she has found no time to curl her hair and put on her best gown to meet you, what do you do? WHICH IB YOUR WAY? Do you, like a dear old sympathizing fellow, take her worn face into a warm embrace and whisper In her ears "Never mind, dearie; I have got home, and we U share the cares for the rest of the day. You co and rest yourself while 1 put Jolinnie and Trot and baby to bed?" Do you see that she sits in the easiest chair while you skip around and minister to her wants? Do you keep silent while she reads the evening paper (to herself), ana are vou mindful of draughts and slam' niing doors while she takes her ease in slippered content? Do the stars dance the Newort and dews the moon sing psalm tunes? Just about as much as you do all this. You expect the hushed home, and the siesta with the pa(er, and the slippers for yourself, to be sure, and if you don't get them you think you're ter ribly abused, and ten to one flounce off to the club to escaiie the noise and con fusion, but you never take it Into your head to consider thut the day has been just as long, and just as busy, and a thousand times more full of petty cares for her as for you. You bolt into the house, and the first thing you say is: "Why isn't supper ready? I'm as hungry as a hound!" "Great Scott! Cun't you keep that child quiet?" or, "What's the use of burning so much coul? Turn off the damper! You are enough to ruin a Vanderbiltl" That's the keynote of the song you Bing, and yet you think it is dreudful if slio ever makes a remark harsher than the bleat of a lamb. Suppose you had been a hunsom cub driver, a board of trade man, cook in a restaurant, cash boy for a dry goods house, a kindergarten teacher and a hospital nurse ull combined for the whole day long,' wouldn't you be more tired, and wouldn't there be more excuse for your irritability than when you have simply attended to a single systematized branch of business. A woman is required to be everything from a reception committee to receive calls in the parlor, to a nurse in the nur sery, and a chief executive in the kitchen, while a business man devotes himself to a single trade or profession. DON'T BE AFRAID OP" "SPOONINO." And next, how do you entertain your wife evenings? If you were invited into a neighbor's house to spend a couple of hours with his wife and daughter, how would you entertain them, 1 wonder? Why, you would put a posyin your but tonholo, and slick up your hair, and blow a little perfume out of the atomizer all over yourself, and throughout the even ing you would overllow witli bright anecdotes and be bo racy and charming that after you had gone away everybody would say. "What a perfectly delightful man Mr. Perkins is! What good com pany I" Now let us see, sir, how you entertain your wife. You stand in front of tho tire and pick your teeth with a wooden toothpick until she starts to put tho chil dren to bed, and every now and then you make a few cheerful remarks about the scarcity of money and the general cussedness of children who run through shoes and clothes so fast When the time comes that all is still and every thing nicely ndupted for a chat or a game, you draw out your miserable newspaper and begin to reud. And you read that paper all to yourself, word for word, and line for line, straight through from edi torial to market report, as if it contained the secret of youth, wealth and eternal salvation! In tho same way one might drink smla water by the pailful, or con sume caramels by the ton! Newspapers, read by husbands in selfish solitude, are answorablo for many wifely heartaches. How many good stories and racy anecdotes do you tell your wife to make her hiugh? How many roses do you pin on your coat and how careful are you of your appearance in the long evenings, when there is nobody by but her to be captivated by your charms and bewildered by your manly beauty? There is just exactly as much excuse for her (and a little more, it may be,) If ber dress is slatternly and her hair untii.y as there is for you, and tliero is precious bttle for either of you. You excuse your indifference and neglect und the withdrawal of fond and foolish attentions, just as dear to tier at forty as at twenty, with the thought: "U, well, she knows I love ber; w hat's the use of 'Bpooning' at our age?" By and by there will cornea time when you shall see her King in her coffin, perhaps. und you would sill your soul that day to be able to shine awuy long years of cold neglect with the manifestation of the love that was always in your heart, cer tainly, but carefully kept on ice. Call it "spooning," if you bke, or any other name of contempt, but 1 tell you there is nothing so sad in all life's history as the vanishisl opiortunity to manifest a love for which some friend went hungry through slow years of undemonstrative and stupid reserve. Amber in Chicago Tribune. Method In Bla Silence. "Bolton told me he had borrowed some money from you. 1 was surprised, be cause 1 never beard you say anything bout it" "No; I still hope to get it back." Drayton Ives, the well known flnan cier and society man. Is a bibliophile. This may not seem to be an expensive pursuit but Mr. Ives manages to spend good deal of money unnn it rni the other day he spent some $1,800 upon 1 rare copy ol an early edition of the Holy Writ j AMBER THINKS ONE TOOK the first parting, Coo,., Eva. kiss mamma (rood oicht. sad D -It What,0 uTnlT for hama moment sloe 1 oiikl ba .id. ruu aU; .. . Ton quiui UK) bis; s a-irua now U. alrp Id baby's Why -HI t UO sltb to t U) school So tto'm. darilnn. bum. snd uy your Will .luT'lMt "u. arms you ion. of furdlf And lwo the birth e foil up. tell Kuj you To ha" romp In mamma's bed; Just think, what lota of fun r" The mothw In the morning oaroe. Io longloj. n With throbblM heart and dewy eyes bealde the On! she Htood. Where Eva atlll alepteoundlj. her arm embracing The (town her mother won when (ha bad klaaed her prt wd nihU Its ribbons with her ailest lean were stained aod limp and wet. iround the white and dimpled neck an empty aleeve was art; While Mary slept alia stole away ere dawn bad Ut the sky. That aomethlng of her Idol near her sinless ores mhrbtlie; , , Unheeded, save by 11 Im who marks each (trier eo dured alone. Roe sought and found her aolaoa for the flrmt that aha bad knowa -Philadelphia Tunea Be Couldn't Eat the Soup. An elderly gentleman in a restaurant having been served with a plate of soup he had ordered, said to the waiter: "Look here, I can't eat this soup." "All right; I'll get you another plate." On receiving the second plate the guest once more remarked; "It's no use. I can't eat this soup." Then the waiter went to the proprietoi and said; "The old gentleman over there is com plaming about the soup. He says he can't eat it." "You don't know how to wait on peo ple. I'll attend to him." The proprietor went to the kicking guest and said, blandly: "I understand you say there is some thing the matter with the soup?" "1 didn't say anything of the kind." "You said you couldn't eat it" "Yes, 1 said 1 couldn't eat it" "Will you tell me why you can't eat that soup?" "Certainly. I haven't got any spoon." Texas Sif tings. A Perfect Man. Several years ago an artist of Dresden persuaded a locksmith there to give up his trade und become nn artists' niodcL It was a good thing for the locksmith, who is now the famous "muscle mun of Dresden, whose mugnilieently developed body mukes him prohubly the most re nowned model in the world. In order to preserve for future artists an exact duplicate of his extraordinary figure, the director of the lloyal Saxon Povzell- aufabrik at Meissen, recently invited him there that a cast from life might be taken of the up'r part of his body. It is said that "his'musculur development is bo complete anil detailed thut even the least and slightest cord of every muscle stands forth prominently, and his whole Ixnly looks as if it were woven together, or plaited like basket work. His muscles have such a hardness that they feel to the touch oa if 'they were carved in wood." Brooklyn Eagle. Sliver Deadhead Ticket. Probably the most unique railroad pass issued this year is that of the Silverton Railroad company of Colorado. It is a thin silver plate, about the size and shape of passes in general use. Un the upper left hand corner of the face of the plate is a vignette showing a curve of the road between Silverton and Ouray. The pass is rolled from silver bars and stamped. the vignette and lettering, with the ex ception of the president's name, being in relief. The name Is intaglio, und is gild ed, as are the vignette and scroll. The number of the pass and the name of the person to whom it is issued are engraved by bund. Brooklyn Eagle. Floating HuaplUla, A novel idea is the fitting up of I steamer in England as a "sea going hos pitaL" This is for the benefit of the deep sea fishermen, who are subject to sickness and accidents, and often havo to endure great suffering before they can be taken ashore for treatment One steamer has already been prepared and dispatched on this mission and another will be sent out as soon as it can be got ready. ban t rancisco Chronicle. The Iron Crown. The Iron crown of Loin hardy consists of a broad circle composed of eix equal plates of beaton gold, joined together by close hinges of the same metal Within is the iron hand which gives it a name. It is about three-eighths of an inch brood and a tenth of an inch thick, and is said to have been made out of the nails used at the Crucifixion, and given to Constan tino by his mother, the Empress Helena, to protect him in battle. New York Tel egratn. A Cllucher. A letter was dropped into the letter box at the Auburn postotlice recently. bound for Boston, with the stamp fast ened on with a pin. It was pushed tnrougn the Btamp near the right side, thence through the envelope and its con tents to the back side, and bock again to the front It was stronger than the coin uion lot of pins or it would never have stood the pressure. Boston Herald. They Wara Little Gtrla, Master Burrill was an old time teacher In the town or Fairfield. A writer in The Somerset Reporter says that he used to punish naughty whispering girls by "bearding them" that hi rubbing bis unshaven chin with a week's stubble on it down their pretty cheeks. It almost took the skin oil. Lewiston Journal. Better Than an Alarm Clock. Alonzo What are you getting that alarm dock for, Augustus! Augustus To wake me up lu the morning. Dou't you have any difficulty in getting up in the morning! Alonzo Not a bit Augustus Yoa must have an alarm clock, then! ' Alonso No. Fact la that the young man next door wears such loud clothes that when be dresses himself Id the morntnf I can't sleep. America. Bow He Cot Out of It, Arabella Roeejru Yes, Charles and I be euns engaged quite young, but he was killed In a railroad accident poor fellow! Mr. Mantel! (fervently How fartunata for me, m' dear. Arabella Roeejar Sir, how should this af fect you! Mr. ManUU-Oh-er-a-I mean, how for for me that I did not witn, the ter- nt" acuity! 8uch things always decreet sue so 8mlth, Gray ft Co. Monthly. Fields of Peat That Are oa rw "Hunters wuo go to the middi, t lion of Roberts Ldand ought tn warned to be careful of their said Mr. Diti. """V " Wbat danger are their horsoj s' quired a newspaper man. "They are liable to be burned ajv, they will have to be shot," said Mr ft ' "Already this season two hunteri14 lost their horses in that way." "How did that occur?" was asked, "It was due to the burning peat . Ditz said. "You see, tlie land over tw! is made ground and the peat U Ignited. What makes this fire ous is that it gives off no smokT hunters may ride through the peatwT out being aware that it is scorchL Z. legs of thoir horses. When toeyhjr! off from the road they go through Btretch of this peat to reach the edge. The horse's legs gink d0WjV this soft ground and he suffers u mjf as if he were walking through a famw The peat may be burning whereto hunter ties his animal, and there SI horse's legs will continue to berotnS until his owner returns and see, Jv, agony he is in." Mr. Ditz went on to say that It U not yet boon found out how thepeatJJ ignited. "It may be due to spontaneous con, bnstion," he said. "The heat of the m beating down oa such dry and infoa. mable stuff is liable to set it on fl Some people say that the hunters bin causod the fire, and others that it k Deen causou uy ouming up tne stnbbls. No matter how it was caused, thorn horses have been killed by it Th have not been roasted to death, bnt Wi been so badly injured that they have hi to be killed, and hunters ought to be jj. formed of the danger." Stockton R publican. Tula Convict Wat llomeiick. A negro escaped from the convict camp iu luumgwiiiti; vvutuj, uj,, recenut. He bad served one year of a term of &i. teen. Ilia escape was discovered alnu immediately after he left the camp, ui every effort was used to catch him, km without success. The rule in such cm Is that if tho escaped is not captured within twenty-fonr or thirty-six how his arrest after that time is a mere aca dent. Everything that could be done it find the negro was done in this instance, but at last hope of ever catching hia was given up, and the hunt was aW doned. A few days ago tho negro walked Into camp dusty and travel worn. The net was entirely voluntary. "1 jes got homesick," was his explanation, "and I wanted to see tho folks." "Did you remember that you still had nearly fourteeu years to serve?" he was asked "Oh, yes; but 1 didn't mean to leave for good. All I wunted was to see the folb once more." lie seemed, in fact, wholly unconcerned about the futurp, and now thut he "bad seen the folks once more" was entirely satisfied with his lot Tb negro lived iu Washington county. Hi had walked nearly the entire distinct there and back. Ho is working today, in stripes and shackles, with nearly four teen years ahead of him yet. Atlantt Constitution. A Woman Who la a Flnanoieh It is frequently asserted that awonu with property has neither pluck nor cool ness in managing her financial affain, granted even, as it rarely is, that itu has the judgment necessary, Atriflinj loss disconcerts her and a profitabli transaction elates her, each unduly, That one woman can stand npnnda rather trying circumstances may, how ever, be truthfully alleged. She it I New Yorker, to all intents and purposet, though her home is in a New Jersey rob' urb. Her husband is a Wall street mas, and her first claim to distinction is that notwithstanding this fact no dollar of her property is in that vortex. Still i likes investments. Three or four yen ago she purchased through an agent an unimproved piece of land in a promising western state for slightly less than $501 She had grown used to holding it and gave it only an occasional thought, when one day within the past sii months ih received by wire from her agent the tounding offer of $15,000 for her land, It must be admitted, that she w thrown into a state of tremendous ex citement. She sent first to the telegraph office to have the dispatch repeated, ana when it was, confirming the first m sage, she wired to her husband to cow home at once. He took the next train, fearing some disaster, and rushed in with breathless anxiety. For answer sheg him the message, and he strongly urgei her to accept the offer. But, fortified by his presence, the wife became cool She decided that a sudden rise of that sort meant something, and she wonld wait developments. The offer was decline! Three months later it was doubled, but now this Portia in finance has becomj convinced that she holds property permanent value, and the second offa she declined by herself. New lort Times. The Crocheted Neefctle. This dainty little structure hails froa the town of Boston. Because ladies art always in Bearch of new fancy work, and because Christmas is drawing near, and there Is an inevitable dearth of Ideas os the subject of presents for the mascu linity of the family, the method of pt dncing this necktie is minutely describri Make a chain of thirty-two, turn a make a shell in second stitch of chain by dipping in five times in same stitch; catch down by knitting single stitch i fourth stitch of chain, make shell n sixth stitch, and so on until yon bs" seven shells. Then make chain of to and turn. Second row, make half shell by dip ping in three times in the very end lost shell, and continne making W1 shells until the end of that row, tnaku half shell again on the end; thuserj second row will have six shells and t half shells, making seven shells in s1 This keeps the sides of the tie Shape like a four-in-hand tie-that make the long end about fifteen in" before narrowing. Narrow g13: by dropping a shell or half shell on row until you have narrowed do"" three shells, then continne and mf the nwV niMw ahnnt fiffn inches. ' gin to widen gradually and wiJe? seven shells as before. Make the swj end about &?ven inches. Two "l. knitting silk are required for the K New York Ptpot AecoramudatlDf. Debtor and creditor: . , "I want to know when you're s-gois jr this here bill. I can't bea-rainuT be' dav in the wedc." "Which dav would suit you bestr "Saturday." "Well, then, you may come every day." Judge.